Gender and Sexuality

After our discussion about gender and sexuality and our viewing of the film Ma Vie En Rose I couldn’t help but start my response with a few comments about a particular group labeled as the GLBT community. GLBT stands for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transgender. I was reminded a lot of a book I read this past semester titled Luna. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the young adult literature novel, it is about a boy named Liam who transforms at night into a girl he has decided to call Luna. Watching Ma Vie En Rose was exactly like reading this novel. This film combined with my knowledge about the novel confirmed for me that gender and sexuality are socially constructed because of the pressures and norms society has placed on us as individuals. We need to act a certain way, dresses according to our gender, and god-forbid show any signs of sexual indifference. I felt bad for Ludovic and equally as bad for his parents because even though the “rule” states it is best to identify someone in terms of how they identify themselves, sometimes we can’t be ourselves, and that causes a chain reaction that changes who we are on the inside. But my question is: what happens when we can’t change on the inside, even though we are dying to expose our real self like Ludovic and Liam? Furthermore, who do we confide in? Will anyone listen? How does someone cope with such tremendous pain and suffering on the inside while at the same time trying to please society on the outside? When I think about these questions I have a hard time coming up with a sensible answer. I can’t imagine going through what Ludovic struggled with on a daily basis and what makes matters worse is he is in such a critical developmental stage where he is trying to figure out his identity and place in the world. We live in a world where stereotypes reign supreme and guidelines are set in place by members of society about how people of each gender are suppose to act, mature, develop, and represent themselves. Unfortunately for individuals like Ludovic and Liam they are different; but different in a way that makes them happy and people overlook individual happiness based on societal norms. Lorber said something I found interesting because it describes exactly what I’ve been talking about here. She said, “In social interaction throughout their lives, individuals learn what is expected, see what is expected, act and react in expected ways, and thus simultaneously construct and maintain the gender order” (60). But what about individuals like Ludovic? How does he/she construct and maintain the gender order?

Briefly, if sexuality today is based on identifying the gender of the person whom our desire is directed towards, then why do people have a difficult time accepting homosexuality? I think Kimmel’s excerpt does a nice job explaining why at least men have a hard time talking about and confronting homosexuality and that’s again because of societal pressures and the term masculinity. Kimmel says, “The hegemonic definition of manhood is a man in power, a man with power, and a man of power” (84). How then can a gay man possess this if he is sharing that power with another man? I think the topic of gender and sexuality are complex and far reaching and like most hotly debated societal issues don’t have a lot of exact answers. However, if our goal is to live in a pluralistic society then each of us, as individuals, need to start confronting and working towards at least developing answers to some of the major outlining questions.

Brian Pullyblank